“You don’t have to drown.”
I was talking to my mom the other day which I have to say is one of my favorite things to do because she is a well of knowledge and ever my favorite teacher. She has a blog too for a much more mature crowd though I will leave a link to her blog at the bottom of this post for any of you who may want to check it out. The reason why I am mentioning her blog is because the day we were talking about writing she told me that she hasn’t been posting on her blog and I was curious as to why and the more we spoke the more it because clear to me what the problem was. Self-doubt.
This is so weird because she is one of the most confident women I know. She taught me confidence so I know, she taught me to love myself and to always be confident and proud of my work and yet here she was going through a self-doubting phase. Why I’m I telling you about my mom? Because human beings have similar problems, similar challenges. I know we all like to think our difficulties are special or unique but truth is that no one’s problem is unique. My mom goes through self-doubt same as everyone else. Same as me when I’m having a hard time with school or a project I want to pitch to a client or this that or the other thing.
It’s okay to have a hard time, it’s okay to go through these phases but you must use them to your advantage otherwise they will swallow you whole. The first step is to talk about it. Do you know how we lose to life? Because we think we can do everything by ourselves, while the fact of the matter is that we can’t. We need help, we are social beings for a reason. We do better together. After talking about it, you need to take the next step. For my mom it was to post on her blog, what’s the next step for you? What are you afraid of? Failing? Criticism? Falling flat on your face? Defeat? Being rejected?! Whatever it is, it’s okay to doubt, it’s in our nature to want certainty and security and to stay only where we are comfortable, but pushing past those fears and doubts is how we grow. It’s how we build up the courage to do more daring things. All you need is a little bit of support. My mom has me and you have me too. As my readers I encourage you to reach out to me anytime you want to talk. My email is open 24 hours a day 7 days a week, use it. You don’t have to drown.
I know what I’m training for, do you?!
I started writing this piece then somehow my thought process went right off the rails and I had to start over. I realized that my opinion was too biased and I’m not here to play “mom” to any of my readers. I don’t exist here to tell you what to do so I had to do this piece over.
What does training mean?! Take your time… I’ll wait. Good we all on the same page now, great! So a lot of people from school have been commenting on how I dress now, they say it’s so official and sophisticated and in truth, yes it is all of that, but why is the question. I’m I working? Yes. And we all are. Some of us just take it more seriously than others. Most students don’t realize that college is a training ground. We are all being trained to be a certain person. I’ll give you an example, say you want to be a business consultant, that dream doesn’t start when you graduate, It starts when you decided that your time in campus and your tuition is a seed and what you want to saw from it is business consulting. Now, who do you want to be in the firm?! Are you a partner? Are you a clerk? Are you in the mail room or are you the Director?! Whatever your answer was is what you are training for.
Every day that’s who or what you are training for. Directors don’t become directors on the day they are appointed, no no no, they become Directors when they’re still in school they know exactly where they are going, they know all their goals and they know just how to make it happen. They look like directors even now, their suits may not be Armani but they are still in a suit, they are precise, they get the job done, they are always ahead of schedule and they don’t have time for excuses. Does it sound like a lot of work?! Of course, it does! If it was easy everyone could do it, but not everyone can and not everyone who starts succeeds because the top is not meant for everyone. It’s meant for the few who are willing to go the distance. It’s meant for the few who know just what is at stake and are able to take advantage of every opportunity. Those are the CEOs and the Directors.
My point being, in this world there is only two things and I know someone may contradict me on this and I hope you do (in the comment section below) but the way I see it there is only winners and losers. People who always know what they are training for and people who don’t have a clue. Nothing in between. Now understand that winning means something different for every individual, but all in all there are only two teams and I know what team I’m playing for do you?!
“That’s the only way to win and that’s also why the winner’s circle is so small.”
Let’s talk about our dreams a little bit shall we? I have a conversation with myself the other day and I would share it with you except it would be TMI on so many levels and none of you would ever recover anyway it was about my dreams so that’s what we are going to talk about today.
Not necessarily mine but all of our dreams. It all started with me asking myself a very interesting question, “What happens after you’ve given it everything you’ve got and still failed?” at first I laughed because I was laughing at myself essentially, I think it’s healthy to laugh at yourself every now and then because we often do stupid things. But be that as it may who has an answer to my question? What happens after you’ve given something you are passionate about everything you have and still don’t get to where you wanted to be?
I don’t know about you but I think that’s an excellent question and after thinking about it for a little while the answer was quite clear to me. It wasn’t something I thought about for too long because I knew the answer right away I was just scared of saying it out loud because in all of us is a bit of mediocrity. The answer is simple. You give it more, you find a different angle a different approach a different way to get yours.
The moment I asked that the first thing that came to mind was when have you ever given something 100% and failed? Because things like that don’t just happen. Because the universe has a system, you give something everything you’ve got then you must get it. That’s just the way the universe works. Believe it or not. But for this article’s sake let just assume that this rare instance you gave it your all and it just wasn’t enough, if it is something you believe in then you never quit, you keep trying and trying again, that’s the only way to win. You may adjust your strategy as needed or advised but that goal remains the same. That’s the only way to win and that’s also why the winner’s circle is so small.